Showing posts with label mobile. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mobile. Show all posts

Tuesday, 28 June 2011

I tExT yOu!!

We all fall in love once, twice, thrice or multiple times in our life. It's either the utter romantic rubbish of LOVE-AT-FIRST-SIGHT or a 'just friends' tag that develops into something much more elaborate than just friendship or it might even be an arranged affair that materializes into love.


The feeling is very vividly expressed in books and movies. And whenever someone like me, thinks about love- I definitely DO NOT picture running around trees and dancing on a grand stage with a 100 dancers in perfectly synchronized steps on a super-romantic melody or for that matter- a flowy gown with perfect hair and jewelery does not fit my kind of love. I might fit better into Pajama- lover :) :P

But my love can take a backseat. So back to where we began. What do you do when you are absolutely sure of the person who is your kinda person- your soul mate ( for that duration- because it's a heavy word). Well, there comes in play the complex art of PROPOSING.

The age old jumping onto the girl's balcony- climbing up the vine is not such a good idea, if the girl's dad finds out..you might be climbing up the stairs to heaven (or hell- as it might suit you). How about going down on your knees- aaawwiieee!!! my first reaction, but it can turn quite embarrassing if you have turned a blind eye to how shy a girl is and how would she react to such an open exclamation of love. And yes, before you go out and go down on your knees in front of a out-spoken and bold girl who you hardly know( and who does not like you)-a slap on the face seems likely.


Proposing always reveals tonnes about how and to what extent a guy loves you- and if its real. But with the advent of technology and all gizmos and gadgets, ways such as going down on your knees and wild and open exclamations of love, though utterly romantic- have gone out of the box. It's been replaced by texting and chatting. I'm no figures person- I do invent a few to add extra effect. :P But yeahh!! from what you notice all around you- almost 9 out of 10 people might opt in for something as non-hazardous as texting the one you love- a message full of love shit- about how much you mean to them and how they would gladly take a bullet for you( phheww that's a relief!! after all that's what I've been dreading!! ). How about going in for something as proclaiming your love on the internet. You obviously can't be slapped if she plans to refuse. But the downfall is, if she accepts you can not obviously watch her go pink and blush!!


Girls I feel still prefer the age old 'going-down-on-the-knees' or writing lovey-dovey poetry for the girl of your dreams-after all it makes them feel extraordinarily special and unrealistic at the same time.I know some might think I'm being very primitive in thinking it's a guys job to propose. No, but I feel, somethings go down well with guys and somethings with girls. So we leave the 'proposing' to the guys and the 'blushing' to the girls!! :)

 Well for most- girls and boys- it's the first time they do so, so gather all your reserve guts kept at the back of the mind and put them to good use. GO ALL OUT!!! and confess your love with all the might in the world!!! :) Well, as Aerosmith puts it- "Falling in love, is so hard on the knees."

Friday, 20 May 2011

LiFt-Y mAtTeRs!!

Now, we all spend a considerable time in our life using the LIFT...going up floors for those of us who hate climbing the stairs...and some of us on rigorous diets..do cheat occasionally by using the lift...instead of climbing the stairs..then we have the lazy people(read i me myself) who make no efforts whatsoever in climbing stairs even if its just a floor that they have to climb..lifts, my friend!!... are invented to use...so i would appreciate if people did not give me that look!!.(even though it reads- for "old and disabled people"...dude!! m tired!!)...so there is a huge variety of people who utilize the luxury of the lift....and I've tried to group them..i don't really know how successfully but I've given it a go.




I) THE OPERATOR:
Now he usually is the person given the task of handling the lift..the first question that usually comes out of his mouth is "Which floor?"
I don't really know how much of English he is familiar with...but this is the one question he will always ask..taking his job very seriously!!
Also he is usually given a chair to sit on...and gets really angry when somebody presses the floor button himself/herself....he'll eye you suspiciously as if the amount of germs you seem to have left behind on  his pure and pristine lift buttons is unbearable..and yes...you could very well be after his job..showing his incompetence!!


II) THE MOBILE MAN:
"Arre..haan maine baat ki thi..but wo keh rhe the ki apna resume forward kr do..." 
"....7th floor.."
"Haan ....haaann.....kyaaa...thodaa tezz bolo....arrre main liftt me hoon........kyaaaaaa....haaaaannn.......kyaaaaa...lifttt..liiiftttt....."
"Oh gaawwdd ..is lift me to kabhi bhi network nhiiii aataa.."


I don't expect Abhishek Bachchan to come out of nowhere and ask THE MOBILE MAN to GET IDEA!!!!
I am not advertising for idea....I think Abhishek Bachchan and the conceptualization of the Idea ads is crap..but that is besides the point...
THE MOBILE MAN will always want to call up someone on his phone when he is in the lift...very well aware of the fact that neither IDEA AIRTEL VODAFONE ...nobody has good enough network in the lift!!!


III) THE SCANNER:
Now I have divided them into males and females...
Males will usually scout for hot chicks...checking out their vital stats...and thinking all sorts of crap in the head..!!! Now-a-days we do have males checking out males for the same reason....they will look from clothes ..to the phone...to the bag...to the laptop... trying to figure out...status..."married...unhappy...desperate"..."single..ready to mingle.." "paid-to-be-nice receptionist kind"


Then we have the females...checking out males..."good-looking..." "gay-like" "sincere" "mama's boy"
but females usually check of females....specially for clothes...."fake-louis vuitton...huh!! atleast she could've managed a better copy"..."oh dear!! such loud makeup....what is she training for...the circus!!! "


IV) THE PERFUME GUY/GIRL:
They will enter the lift....and from that moment..you will pray to God...to give you back your cold and cough..which took a month to get over..
The aura around them is such...that you just wish you never had a nose!!!!
The unbearably strong perfume..as if he/she spends a fortune on the the deodorant (good for the manufacturers though!!) everyday emptying a bottle...is too much to handle.!!


V) THE STARE MASTER:
He/she will look at anything and everything in the lift..the people..the fan..the buttons...the operator...he/she looks at people as if they are something to eat (i nicked that line from..twilight!!....no copyright violation I guess!!!!!)
They usually make the person around them a little conscious of their own appearance..hair.. make up!!
He will keep staring at a certain point...little things like fan ...lift authorization certificate.. intrigues him/her...which is weird...if  you are at the receiving end of the STARE!!!! BEWARE!!!


VI) THE PEEPER: 
Whatever you do on your phone...i-pod..more recently the i-pad...he will want to know and have a peep at everything..
even if its a personal message that you are sending or receiving...he will read it at a bullets speed...and try and assess your situation...personally I hate peepers!!!! I think they should get a life..as it is so annoying!!!




I guess I have broadly tried to group the various kinds of people you meet in the lift...but I'm sure there are many more interesting sights we get to see in the lift..and the list will only grow longer..!!! :) :)


JUST A THOUGHT!! :)